


Taking Inventory

by PiousMage



Series: Fire Emblem Trans Week 2020 [6]
Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Soen no Kiseki/Akatsuki no Megami | Fire Emblem Path of Radiance/Radiant Dawn
Genre: M/M, Mutual Pining, Pre-B Support, Pre-Radiant Dawn, Pride, Trans!Ike, Trans!Soren, ike sure as shooting doesn't have them either but he tries, soren is non-binary but does not have the words for it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-21
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:49:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25429453
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PiousMage/pseuds/PiousMage
Summary: While going through the storeroom of the Greil Mercenaries, Ike and Soren have a conversation about what it means to be a man, and what it means to take pride in who you are.
Relationships: Ike/Senerio | Soren
Series: Fire Emblem Trans Week 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1833706
Comments: 7
Kudos: 32
Collections: Fire Emblem Trans Week 2020!





	Taking Inventory

"Ike."

Dust hung in the air of the storehouse. Soren and Ike were carrying out the thankless work of going through the company's stores and throwing out anything that had rusted, rotted, or otherwise decayed beyond use. It only happened once a month or so, and it was normally work that Soren's fastidious nature required that he undertake himself, for fear of anyone else being unable to do it exactly right. This time, Ike had offered to help out, feeling a need to shoulder a heavier load since inheriting leadership of the Greil Mercenaries.

"Yeah?" Most of their conversations started off like this.

Soren heaved a box up and then dropped it on the ground unceremoniously, the contents clanking around. Another reason he preferred to do this work alone was so that he wouldn't embarass himself like that, though he knew Ike wouldn't judge. If anything, he'd only offer to help.

In fact, he was already doing it. "If you need help lifting something, just tell me," he said.

"It's not that. But thanks." Soren waved a hand, catching his breath. "I want to ask you a personal question."

"Of course." Ike leaned his elbow on a tower of boxes, not noticing how precariously they were stacked.

"Before I do, I want to be sure. Not a word of this conversation should be uttered to anyone outside this storehouse." As he spoke, Soren carefully lifted Ike's elbow off of the tower of boxes.

"You don't need to do this for every single private conversation we have, Soren." Ike lifted the top box off of the stack and set it down on the ground. "I'm not the type to go about gossiping people's ears off."

"I know," Soren knelt down and started rummaging through the contents of the box Ike had set down, "I just like being sure."

"Great. What's your question?"

Soren paused before responding, his hands frozen in the box for just a moment. "How are you so confident in what you are?"

Ike folded his arms. "What, you mean, like the guy thing? Soren, we've spoken about this before. I know what I am. I am a man, like my father was. I knew that before anyone else did." He started going through the box left on the top of the stack, tossing a few rusted knives inside the box marked for disposal. "You're not having second thoughts about it, are you?"

"It's not that," Soren replied, his voice quivering more than he'd like it to. His hand brushed against some dried meat and he shivered at the texture. "Maybe it is. I don't know. I suppose I don't feel as attached to my manhood as you do. I can barely say the sentence 'I am a man' with a straight face."

"Try it, then." Ike looked down at Soren, his face stoic.

"What?"

"Say that sentence with a straight face."

Soren stood up and dusted his cloak off. He took a deep breath and exhaled. "I am...a man."

Ike turned away to start digging through the box again. "It sounds like you're reading a line in a play."

That was surprisingly insightful. "Huh. I'd never thought about it like that."

"Is being a man to you like reading lines from a play?" His face was buried in the box, now. "It probably shouldn't be."

Soren gingerly deposited a rotting piece of fruit into the disposal box. "Well, it doesn't feel like that all the time. Some days, it all comes naturally to me." He wiped his hands with a cloth. "Others, I'm plagued with self-doubt."

"We talked about that too, remember? Even I have days where I wake up and wonder if all this stuff about binding my chest is nonsense." Satisfied with his inventory of one box, he picked it up and set it aside, going through the one under it now. "Those thoughts don't stick around for long, thankfully. But they're always there. You just have to tune them out."

"It's not quite like that, either." Soren shook his head. "I suppose what I'm trying to say is that you take so much pride in being a man. Being strong, being able to win a fight, being able to support others."

"That's not everything that being a man is." Ike had paused his rummaging to stare up at the ceiling. "I don't have the words for it, but it's more complicated than that." There was a beat. "Titania is strong, she can win any fight, and she supports all of us, yet she's one of the proudest women I've ever met."

Soren laughed, scooting his box to the side. "It's not like you to use logic so well."

Ike looked back down at his companion, his face flushed with the slightest tinge of pink. "It's not logic. I'm just talking."

In the space vacated by the box, Soren sat down, his arms curled around his legs as he pulled them close. "Either way, you're quite skilled at alleviating my less logical anxieties."

"In words I can understand, Soren?"

"You make me feel better, Ike. Talking to you helps me feel like a person." He looked away. "You know I detest spelling it out for you like that."

Ike walked over to where Soren was sitting and squatted across from him, a hand on his shoulder. "Hey, there's not a soul in the world I'm closer to than you, except for Mist. You know I'm always here for you, Soren."

Soren rested his own hand on Ike's, leaning his head against them. "I do."

"If you can't take pride in being a man, take pride in being yourself. Take pride in being Soren." Ike smiled. "I think that's something to be proud of."

Another deep breath. "Let me guess. Without me, everything would fall apart?"

"Something like that. We really have had this conversation a lot of times, haven't we?"

Soren closed his eyes. "I'm not sure. But every time we talk, I always feel better."

Ike's heart always hurt whenever he saw Soren like this. Not just because he know Soren's pain so well, but because he know there was probably even more pain that Soren was hiding from him. Because what he felt when he saw this raven-haired boy was unlike what he felt when he looked at anyone else in this world. If only you loved yourself as much as I do, he thought. He then realized that thought meant that he was in love with Soren.

"Ike. Is everything okay? You're red in the face." Oh. Soren had opened his eyes.

"I might need some air," Ike responded, standing up suddenly. "It's so musty in here."

"Yeah. I think we can take a break for a bit. We've gotten a lot done today."

"Have we?" Ike said, his hands on his hips as he surveyed the woefully disorganized storeroom.

"I think so," Soren replied, looking with fondness at the face of the only boy who understood him.


End file.
